A new New Beginning

Yes, a "new" New Beginning... Haven't you started everything all over again? ...just to find yourself back to where you started, or in a worse place? Then you start it all over again... Again???

Well, that's me. I have to start all over again from the lowest point of my life. Lower point than most people in this nation, but not the lowest possible. Here we go:

I'm $120,000 in debt, and that does not include my mortgage and my cars. These are all credit card debts that I acquired mostly by building my business, such as training, business equipment, and lots of traveling to conferences (and training). I got certified in a few things and I'm a "genius" as far as knowledge and expertise, but I totally suck at marketing myself.

How do I deal with that large debt?

First of all, I didn't even realize that I was sooo deep in debts. I kept taking out new credit cards with 0% tranfer balance for a limited period and transfered balances from my other cards. What I didn't notice, though, was that I kept using up all my cards slowly, slowly, till I got to a point that I had 13 cards, with cash limits of up to $20,000.

Needless to say, when you get caught in the credit card game, you'll end up maxing them out (especially if your income doesn't catch up with you).

So, I have no income and my wife is making around $3000 a month (after taxes).

Let's do the math for what's going on every month:

Credit Card Expenses - $2800.00
Mortgage: - $700.00
Food: - $600.00
Car Payment - $300.00
Child Care Expenses - $ 100.00 (ok, I admit it, I have to say "No" to many, many things that I wish I could give them)

Total: - $4,500.00

Total Income - $3,000.00

So, I'm in the whole with $1,500.00 bucks... and that's month after month...

What does one do in a situation like this?

First of all: PANIC!!!
I slept for weeks waking up in the middle of the night with chest pains and difficulty to breath. I felt like a concrete block was on my chest. My temples were pulsating, my heart was beating fast, I had stomach cramps (day and night), and felt like this is the end of my life and I screwed up my kids life, my wife's life, and my dreams-filled life.

Yes, you are right. Suicide is a good thought. Now I understand why suicide rates are the highest among mid-age male. Except I have this principle (or conviction), where I believe that there can be nothing to drive me into suicide. I'd rather move up into the mountains and live a hermit life than take my life (anyway, I've always been very attracted to nature and spend in it as much time as humanly possible).

So, what other options does someone in this situation have? Ask a rich relative or friend for a gift, or at least a low (or no-) interest loan for 50 years... Scratch that! I have no real friends that are rich. (it somehow seems that those who hit the "jackpot" - and I have several friends in that boat - become more distant and cautios; almost afraid that we'll beg them for a handout). Yes, in the past I've been in a situation where I was making thousands of dollars a day and was doing beyond my dreams; and at that time there were many people who borrowed large sums of money from me and I always gave. I understand how it is to not have (I used to be homeless in the early 90s for close to a year - yes, I know, my life is a rollercoaster: either up or down - rarely in between).

I called a bunch of so-called financial advisors... It seems that most try to sell me something, instead of telling me how I can get out of this mess. Most want to charge me $500 to $1,000 (STAY AWAY FROM THOSE!!!); finally, after weeks of search I found a non-profit that's been in business for more than 30 years (Consumer Credit Counseling). They charge only $25 up front, than a monthly maintanance fee, which in my case was calculated to be around $40.00 - not a bad deal.

Consumer Credit Counseling will send a proposal to each of your creditors and they'll drop your late fees and financial charges and they'll lower your interest rate. If you stick with the program you'll be out of debt in five years.

So, I'm on the program.

The counselor added up all our expenses (including hair care, cat food, birthday gifts, and you won't believe what else - but all true) and it turns out that our monthly minimum expenses (including the credit card bills) are $5200 and we have about $3000 in income. HOw about that?

Bankruptcy?
I don' know. It'd look really bad on my record. My business is in consulting and public speaking and some companies - I heard - they do a background check on you. I really don't want to have bankruptcy on my record.